All Groups Are Unique

All groups are unique.

They're unique in makeup. They're unique in why they come together as a group. They're unique in what they are trying to move forward or toward as a group. And yet, because humans are herd animals and because herds are a very particular type of group, there are stages and ways all groups move even in their uniqueness.

Recognizing what stage we are in and what can surface in that stage, is helpful for setting expectations. It can help with anticipating when conflicts might surface or subside and generally provide context to what we are individually experiencing within a group. In Belonging Based Facilitation, we use a group formation model first published by Bruce Tuckman in 1965. It has since been iterated, developed, revised and contested by various practitioners and facilitators. Like any other tool, it has its limitations, and we still find it incredibly useful. Tuckman’s tool reinforces our claim that anytime a group changes composition - whenever someone joins or leaves a group - it is a new group. From inception to conclusion, through disruption and change, groups move through these different stages and the expectations that come with them. Tuckman’s framework helps to make sense of the behaviors we see in groups as they travel through different stages. Using the framework is like having a forecast - the forecast doesn’t perfectly represent or create the weather, but it certainly helps you prepare. 

Forming

We sometimes call this the warming stage. Think about stretching before a run, vocal warmups before a concert, or warming up a cast iron pan before cooking on it. In this stage we bring our most acceptable self. This is when people are at their most polite and can be called the ‘honeymoon’ period because it can have all that new relationship energy. The central question in this stage is what are we doing here? As Belonging-based facilitators we focus on each component of this: who is the we? What is the thing this group is doing? where is here? And how did we all get here?

Storming

There are so many different ways to storm! Some groups storm loudly and with lots of energy, other groups move through this stage like a fog or persistent drizzle. However we enter this stage or move through it the central element of this stage is that it is where conflict enters the chat. Sometimes, there will be disagreement, and other times, there may be trauma present, but all the times, these ruptures take place in the body of the group, not just in the bodies of individuals.

Central to this stage is the question: who do I get to be in this group? OR How authentic can I be in this group? As facilitators, we look at how the group tends to the conflicts that emerge in this stage: do they move at them directly? Or does the group avoid or ignore the conflicts and tensions arising? However the group does or does not deal with the conflicts during this phase sets the stage for how the group will work together moving forward. 

Groups that engage actively and generatively in conflicts find greater authenticity and flexibility at the next stage, whereas groups that avoid or suppress conflict find a kind of ungrounded comfort. This is when it is crucial to be trauma-informed. In groups with a rich trauma history, people may experience conflict as an existential threat, triggering threat responses (like fight or flight). Our role then is to help the group turn toward the conflict (or threat) with clarity, compassion and creativity. 

Norming

Whatever we practice, we make permanent. This stage follows the storming phase specifically because it is the cementing of how the group moves together. Norms are the implicit ways that a group behaves. These implicit, cultural behaviors are most obvious when moving from one (group) culture to another. For instance, when my family relocated from the Pacific Northwest to the South, we had to teach our children to address adult Black people as Ms. Mr. or Mx., not by their first name! 😬 

In the norming stage, individuals, grapple with how to behave together on this journey. As a group, folks are noticing what kinds of leadership emerge in the group and how they distribute the crucial work of the group: specifically how does the group take care of safety, agency, dignity, and belonging? As facilitators we may posit this directly or indirectly. Noticing how a group makes decisions, for instance, gives us great insights into the individual and collective agency of the group. 

Performing

This is the sweet spot for groups when the norms that have been established in the prior stage really work for the group. Decision-making and distribution of labor is equitable and meaningful; conflict is met with curiosity and creativity; and the group may begin to have a sense of its own ‘mortality,’ recognizing that it may not continue forever in this iteration even if it wants to. This is the stage where the individual authenticity of each group member gets to shine- when each individual fits together like a puzzle. Or an orchestra in which there may be a strings section with several violins, but none is any less important than the other and anyone that doesn’t play (or doesn’t play their best) makes the sound/music the less well off for it. 

Adjourning / Changing

That’s a wrap! Adjourning is when a group comes to the end, and folks must accept that “this group as it is composed, will never exist again.” Similar to the storming stage, if the group has accumulated untended trauma, the end of the group can feel more like a threat than a natural part of all living systems. 

Individuals tend to want to know: what happens next? Who am I without this group? Sometimes we say that how a group ends meetings is how it meets endings. Is there a pause, gratitude, and time to shift? Or is it a rush off to the next thing? Individually we describe some people as lingerers (staying until and often past the ‘end’) and others as absconders (leaving before the ending can really arrive). We bring intention to this part of the process by asking groups we facilitate: what is a good goodbye? There are some similarities and idiosyncrasies for different groups and individuals, but are gratitude, a recognition that the end is here, and some tender words or touch come up consistently. 

Reflection

In the next few weeks, reflect on the groups you’re a part of - whether that be family, friends or colleagues. How do you notice the stages of groups showing up?

Amends Cycle

We are all in a particularly energized, impassioned, and changing time on our planet. Whether we are focused on our global politics, community movements, or family changes - we are all experiencing moments of deep connection. And connection also means at times, we will experience hurt. At In The Works, we know belonging also requires us to be present at times of hurt and having the skills to move forward in repair. When harm happens, it can feel like we have lost everything and it may keep going forever.

Yet, we know for us and those we care about - the harm must end. And we can reflect on the hurts of our past to know it will end, with intention. We also know it only ends with true and authentic amends. Amends is not just apology; though that is the first step. It also requires making sure those most impacted are made whole again. And after that, the behaviors and choices that cause harm are changed, so harm doesn’t happen again. We acknowledge our history, then must take action, internally within our organization, and within every bit of the work we do - to make repair. From this ending. A new beginning can start…

Impact, Amends, and only then, Intentions

So much of group dynamics is about the individual person-to-person interactions that make up our day. And those person-to-person interactions also make up the conflict culture of our institutions. Humans are amazing at having clear intentions, within ourselves, and at times need to take inventory to make sure our intentions are being received as we wish them to be. Often, “stuckness” is about communication of intentions in isolation, when what is needed is also reflection on impacts and amends. Take time to consider: How are impacts, amends, and intentions showing up for our group and work? 

Amends reminds us -  “We can be whole again” - and we have to take action together to get there. Too often, it is the starting of amends that is a challenge. Whether naming we owe someone amends, or naming that we are hurt and require amends to stay in connection - there is a vulnerability there. And when vulnerability is present, the hurts and experiences of the past can keep us from taking action in the present. Can keep us from taking that first step.

Amends is about trust and (re)building trust anew. And we each have a role in building that trust - whether we are the one giving amends or receiving it.

So from that vulnerability - Where can we begin?

We must start with our role and naming what we have done. Apology & Accountability is the acknowledgement of the harm and naming ourselves n that harm. We have to start from the humility of recognizing ourselves, our actions, and how it impacts others.

We then must work to make it right, if we are able. Atonement lets us name the impacts, identify places to make repair, and move the harmed individual or collective body toward wholeness, if possible. This step is important, even in situations where we cannot return to a previous state of being.

Too often, individuals and institutions stop at apology and never get to Action Adjustment. There can be no amends until action is taken to change the circumstances that allowed the harm in the first place. All involved - those harmed, those who caused harm, and those who witnessed it - need to work to change behaviors and/or systems so the harm doesn’t happen again.

Once the harm has been named, accountability has been centered, atonement has repaired, and action adjustment has made steps to keep it from happening in the future - the seeds of trust have been planted. But only through the Acceptance processes can trust be re-established. Acceptance requires time and practice for all involved to be receptive and act on that change. With those repeated actions we water each other so trust will grow.

Understanding our role in the amends cycle and what skills we need to practice is transformative in our ability to be authentic in our communities, work, and families.

Wholeness & Wellness

We begin whole/well and we can be whole/well again. 
We begin whole. We begin well. 

In the age of a capitalized, commodified wellness industry, I don’t mean this just in some sort of fantastical “we are all Wakandan” way, but I do mean that, too. I mean that we begin with complete access to a full range of emotions, sensations and experiences. I mean that is true for me as an individual, and you as an individual, and for us as a community, and as a species. 

A human-induced global climate catastrophe, accelerating wealth inequality, multiple genocides, the rise of the far-right, and in the US, an assault on the rights of Black people, people with uteruses, and trans people. It makes perfect sense that we are craving wellness. Everyone and their momma is talking about increased political polarization and in fact we are desperate to be whole again.  As someone who works with individuals and organizations who have rich trauma histories (and often rich trauma presents) one of the most important reminders we offer is that we can be whole again

So why does it feel so hard to return to wholeness?

My favorite definition of wellness to date is from the book Burnout by Emily and Amelia Nagoski, “ to be well is not to live in a state of perpetual safety and calm, but to move fluidly from a state of adversity, risk, adventure, excitement, back to calm and out again.” Being under persistently traumatic conditions makes that fluidity really difficult to attain, let alone maintain.

Trauma, as prevalent and persistent as it is, is actually abnormal. Trauma is the disruption, the distraction, the dis-ease. And while we sometimes center it, we center it to get a clearer view on just how ‘not the norm’ it is. That it is surrounded, preceded, (and can be  followed) by wellness, by wholeness. 

Our innate wellness/wholeness does get interrupted, our connection to that wellness compromised, but it doesn’t break. We are not broken. I am not and neither are you. We may have experienced these interruptions to our safety, agency, dignity, or belonging (our four Fundamentals), and yet, we do not all end up traumatized. This is especially true if the events are few and far between. However, even if our trauma exposure is high, it’s easier to return to wellness when our Fundamentals are supported and resourced e.g. by loving community or a universal basic income. 

In this age of wellness weekends, wellness aisles, wellness podcasts, etc. we are being sold a commoditized individualized version of wellness: take this supplement! eat this superfood! attend this retreat! But right now our political body, our social body, our collective body, even our planetary body is not well. So the fact is that we individually find it difficult to return to wellness, and it is because we are struggling against a current of illness.  

When we have robust belonging and firm safety, we may not feel interruptions as intensely, and we may recover from them more fluidly. 


So what can we do with that? Most of the literature would have you believe you need to be “post” the trauma to begin recovery. Nah. I have no intention of waiting for racism to end or patriarchy to be smashed in order to be free from their effects. So here’s what you do: go and get your Fundamentals. Now, don’t take them from anyone else, but find the places, people, communities, moments, and relationships that support and reinforce them. Where do you find yourself belonging? Able to show up in your fullness and authenticity and be welcomed? With whom are you safe? Able to take risks and be relatively secure? When do you practice agency? Making decisions, even erroneous ones, then getting to make the next one and the next. And who supports our dignity? Your unassailable sense of self-worth that isn’t tied to any achievement or behavior. Find those spaces and steep yourself in them.If you don’t have them, co-create them, and if you have an abundance of them, invite others into them. “We can be whole again,” is always plural: I can’t be well without you.

Introducing ITW + The Work

At In The Works (ITW), we build belonging. We do this through facilitation that brings group together in care. Through coaching that brings clarity. And through summaries that document the way you’ve come and the journey ahead.

We built In The Works as our way to bring intentional story, space, and solace to our communities of healers, educators, artists, activists, and change makers. We know the real work is always “in the works” and needs stewardship and time.

ITW supports Black, Indigenous, and People of Color (BIPOC)organizations, spaces, and collaborations that are shaping social change. Our clients are entrepreneurs, funders, non-profit leaders, educators, artists, and community leaders on the front-lines of transformational change in education, politics, the arts, design, and social relationships. Our approach is Black-liberative (centering Black and Indigenous wisdom & practices), anti-racist (disrupting, repairing, and taking action to end racist practices & behaviors), and trauma-informed (understanding how trauma impacts us due to the conditions of colonization, oppression, & capitalism we are surviving).

KHT. I am a dreamer who believes we all can build a present and future that is joyful and liberating. As a Black queer woman and mom, I move through the world with care and compassion. I have dedicated my career to making change with neighbors, whether marching in the streets, writing policy, or building an organization – it has been about people, passion, and power-building. I am a catalyst, often seeing what is possible and lighting a spark that helps others see it too. This has led me through a unique career in social change non-profits, philanthropy, and as a legislator serving as Washington State Representative and as a Seattle City Council Member.

For me, facilitation is a way of holding space for feeling our way forward as a collective. I know my life has been shaped and held by the relationships and care of others. I grew up in rural Missouri, where people didn’t have much but what they had they gave you. The oldest of four kids, we were raised by our mom and circle of strong women. And now, I get to pay some of that forward in holding space for reflection, repair, and reimagining through In The Works. I love time to connect, to sing a karaoke duet, or to pull some tarot cards.

TMW. I grew up in upstate NY on a small section of the Hudson River in lands traditionally stewarded by the Esopus and Iroquois. By that time, General Electric had been pouring polychlorinated biphenyls (PCBs)into it for over 30 years and it had been deemed unsafe for swimming. In an effort to deal with that devastation, there was a plan to dredge the Hudson to get all the PCBs off the floor. I remember attending protests about cleaning up the river and though we were only sitting on this small portion, we were in the streets and a part of something much bigger. This is what I know, no matter if you don’t have the power to right an entire wrong, you still have a responsibility to tend to your little piece. Your piece of time and place and relationship because your piece is also a part of something much bigger.

I am a social worker by training and a facilitator by practice/purpose. I love to get with groups and help them be who they need to be to get where they are going. Though my early career was dedicated to working directly with young people, over the past fifteen years I have focused on working with organizations, typically run by and/or for folks with rich trauma histories. in city government, non-profits, universities, in community, and now through In The Works.

Why belonging and why now? Othering is going out with a roar, not a whimper and whatever comes next needs to be rooted in a recognition of collective wholeness and wellness. Belonging is a crucial way to get there. Humans are also herd animals, we thrive on and in belonging. And we suffer without it. From the Surgeon General’s call to action on the epidemic of loneliness to the ongoing warnings about political extremism and polarization, we understand belonging as a cornerstone for our individual and collective wellbeing. Counterfeit belonging, what we often experience as ‘fitting in,’ is not going to do it for us - not within our organizations, our communities, or our neighborhoods. We have to connect to one another. We have to belong to one another. And we have to build repair together. When people belong, they are more authentic, more creative, and healthier.

Art by Såhi Velasco. Check them out on instagram at @tendervirgo and @tendervirgofarts. You can also see their work on their website TenderVirgo.com.



Integrative Trauma and Healing Framework

Integrative Trauma and Healing Framework

Authors: Teddy McGlynn-Wright, MSW and Leslie Briner, MSW (March, 2021)

Introduction

Years ago, the authors were two of several brought into a local alternative school that had reached out in the wake of several suicides and homicides in their student body. The typical crisis response was to bring in mental health professionals and social workers and have them available to the students and faculty for grief counseling. After doing this half a dozen times and being only midway through the year, the principal reached out to a wider group, including pediatricians, activists, and educators.  A significant part of the framework that we are presenting to you is owed to that school, that principal, and those who came together over and over again to better understand what was killing our children. 

In the years since sitting at student desks in a spare classroom in South Seattle, we have written, spoken, presented, reflected, and refined what we now call the Integrative Trauma and Healing Framework. It is composed of the following four statements, each of which we will unpack briefly here. 

1. Trauma and healing are embodied on 5 levels: individual, collective, systemic, intergenerational and/or historical.

2. Trauma is the harmful interruption of safety, agency, dignity and/or belonging-- fundamental needs of all human beings.

3. Trauma is experienced in the body-brain, overwhelming our ability to cope with and integrate thoughts, sensations, and emotions connected to an experience. 

4. Pathways to healing occur anytime we do anything that restores and/or promotes safety, agency, dignity and belonging and moves bodies towards integration and wholeness. 

These four statements represent a continuation (and hopefully a refinement) of what trauma is. We do not see the current definitions as incorrect, but incomplete.  In our social work training, we were primarily introduced to trauma through its effects: intrusive thoughts, hypervigilance, dissociation, etc. For a relatively concise history of the controversy of the diagnosis, check out: The Professional Counselor, Trauma Redefined. We see trauma by its long shadow, but have had a much more difficult time describing what exactly is casting that shadow beyond the textbook definition of “exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury or sexual violation".  

We offer this as a cohesive framework for understanding and responding to trauma that specifically does not require years of training or a complex statistical manual to comprehend. To that end, this framework is descriptive more than prescriptive (though statement four does give some direction about what can help us heal). It describes what causes trauma, what trauma is and gives us a way to respond to it, in ourselves, our communities, and societies as ‘natural helpers’, people who are likely to encounter trauma and who are frequently around.  It gives us a nuanced sense of what ‘flavor’ of trauma someone might have experienced without having to know much about the incident.  

It further provides ways to respond to harm that are not clinical interventions. There is, of course, a role for clinical interventions in trauma and healing, but it is not the only way that people(s) heal from trauma. In ourselves, communities, and societies we are all capable of being in healing relationships as friends, siblings, roommates, partners, mentors, aunties, etc. Since  the time we are in direct therapeutic contact with a therapist or counselor is dwarfed by the time we are out and about living our lives it seems imperative that we have ways of understanding what one another is going through and pathways to support healing and transform the conditions causing the trauma in the first place.  


1. Trauma and healing are embodied on 5 levels: individual, collective, systemic, intergenerational and/or historical.

This is a basic ecological framework. We recognize that individuals are embedded within larger contextual structures and that this is a two-way influential relationship. Larger groups are made up of smaller groups and trauma and healing can take place at any of these levels. 

Individual/interpersonal trauma is experienced at the level of the individual and has been the primary focus of research and discourse around trauma thus far. Collective trauma is experienced within a group, typically a racial, ethnic, religious, socio-cultural, and/or geographic target group. The trauma is connected to that group's collective experience and/or social identities. Systemic trauma occurs from policies, practices, and laws that are traumatic in their intents or effects and is inflicted by and within systems that have widely perceived legitimacy and power.   Historical trauma is a large-scale collective trauma inflicted by one group on other groups with the explicit intent of massive harm, including genocide and annihilation.  The holocaust and internment during WWII, and chattel slavery, colonization, and use of boarding schools for indigenous children into the 1970's in the United States are all examples of historical trauma. Intergenerational trauma is somewhat unique in that it describes and contains the modes of transmission for trauma genetically, environmentally, and behaviorally.

We use the term “embodied” intentionally.  First, to describe a thoroughness and to re-body our understanding of individual trauma so that it isn’t merely something that happens to an individual person, primarily impacting their brain.  Rather, trauma occurs throughout the whole body-brain as do the pathways to healing.  Second, we acknowledge that there are collective, systemic, intergenerational, and cultural bodies, all experiencing trauma and healing in their relative contexts.  These bodies align with the different levels at which trauma and healing occur. This offers a framework to both name the presence of collective, systemic and/or historical traumas and to cultivate specific opportunities and strategies for healing on those levels.  

Our almost exclusive focus in mainstream trauma discourse has been on the individual occurrences and impacts of trauma.  However, simply put, collective trauma needs collective healing.  Systemic trauma needs accountability and restorative/transformative justice.  Historical trauma needs acknowledgement and transformation within cultures and societies.   And we need to look to the modes of intergenerational transmission of trauma in order to deepen our understanding and capacity for healing and transformation.  

2. Trauma is the harmful interruption of safety, agency, dignity and belonging—fundamental needs of all human beings.

Much of the Integrative Trauma and Healing Framework was seeded by practitioners and teachers of Generative Somatics, a group of politicized healers grown out of the Bay Area, California. What we discovered through engagement with social workers, public health professionals, teachers, students, and others was that clinical definitions of trauma were useful for diagnosing and treating trauma at a clinical (individual) level. However, when describing trauma at the other levels of our experience, we needed a definition that could capture the vast ways in which people experience that which leaves the ‘indelible imprint’ that is often ascribed to trauma.  We needed framing that went beyond the realm of clinical impacts and actually described what trauma is-- a harmful interruption of safety, agency, dignity, or belonging.  

Safety- A sense of being physically, psychologically, emotionally secure.  Having all basic needs met in ways that don't cause harm or exploitation. 

Agency- The ability to make a decision, experience reasonable consequences for that decision, and make another decision.

Dignity- A sense of power and worthiness that is not based on harm or dehumanization.  

Belonging- Being a full member of a group. Being in meaningful relationships with people, the planet, spirit, and/or other living beings.  

The reality of our current social, cultural, and economic conditions (at least since colonization) is that we don’t experience these 4 fundamentals as birthrights.  We experience them as needing to be earned, traded, or granted by some outside authority.  People and collectives spend significant resources hustling for safety, agency, dignity and belonging instead of on activities and pursuits that cultivate wellness and conditions where all people can thrive.  Hence, trauma occurs when a person, group or system interrupts our ability to maintain these fundamentals in harmful ways.  These interruptions can feel like constriction, overextension, erosion and/or destruction--they can leave the "indelible imprint" after a single experience or many years of chipping away.  

In our clinical and community experiences, we witnessed countless situations where people were trading one or more of these fundamentals to keep the others intact.  In Teddy's work with young people vulnerable to gang involvement, he often witnessed young people trading the physical safety of carrying a gun for the belonging of being a member of a gang. Leslie’s experiences with young people in the sex trades showed youth frequently giving up safety and belonging to maintain a sense of agency. 

3. Trauma is experienced in the body-brain, overwhelming our ability to cope with and integrate thoughts, feelings and emotions connected to an experience.

This is the way that trauma is often most obvious to those of us who have experienced it or witnessed a loved one moving through it. We experience overwhelming emotionality so intense that we numb out, in order to move along with our daily lives. It is the time-travel that people describe when they say they are being ‘triggered.’ Our bodies are going back in time in an attempt to correct something that has already happened. Typically, our emotional experiences are like writing in a journal with traumatic experiences pressing down so hard that it leaves furrows pages later, or even tears through the page and stains the subsequent pages with ink. This is what we mean when we use words like ‘indelible' or 'stuck'.  

Our threat response systems are physiological, not just psychological and often not logical and this is as true of the collective body as it is of the individual body. When an individual or collective perceives a threat the flight, fight, freeze, appease response is fast, decisive and automatic.  Controlled by our ancient amygdala, our threat response systems have one job and that is to survive.  Given the conditions of poverty, abuse and oppression, it makes perfect sense that many people are navigating perpetual activation of their threat response system.  Then, over time, the threat response becomes stuck on default.  Even when we describe physical traumas, such as a broken leg, we acknowledge a harm to one part is a harm to the whole body.  When healing from a broken bone we need other muscle groups and systems to compensate and activate to enable that recovery.  Healing, too is a process in which it is rare that we would consider a harm to the part not to be a harm to the whole. As Audre Lorde writes in, The Cancer Journals, “any amputation is a physical and psychic reality that must be integrated into a new sense of self.”  

4. Pathways to healing occur anytime we do anything that restores and promotes safety, agency, dignity and belonging and moves bodies towards integration and wholeness.

Finally, to our favorite of the four: how do we heal? We are in fact, healing every day. And every day that we wake up is another day that we get to heal from the many harms that we experience as people consistently exposed to suffering and oppression.  Each of us, individually and collectively, should have universal access to healing. This includes the knowledge, skills and tools to promote healing in our selves, families, communities and societies and the underlying belief that we all deserve healing and have it within ourselves to cultivate that reality. 

This final statement operates not just at the individual level but at each of the 5 levels we described earlier.  It engages our imaginations (which is a documented resilience-builder) to consider what transformation might look and feel like. What we would have to do to promote and restore collective dignity to a group that has had their dignity destroyed or seriously impinged upon. (The recent restoration of voting rights to people with felony convictions in Florida is one great example of this.) Who at the collective, systemic, and cultural levels are situated to promote and restore safety, agency, dignity and belonging?  What could public institutions and systems be like if they were truly dedicated to providing universal basic needs to all people like housing, food, water, health care, education, transportation and utilities?  How can we build cultures rooted deep in dignity and striving for liberation?  The pathways are endless and available to us.  

We hope you found this brief exploration of the Integrative Trauma and Healing Framework helpful. This framework comes from years of practice, observation, collaboration, reflection, and refinement and while not perfect, this reflects our best current thinking and is as succinct as we would like it to be. Please use them with attribution (authors names and link to this post) and be on the lookout for a deeper dive into these concepts in the coming months.